A Month-by-Month Guide to Wedding Planning Without Losing Your Mind

Yael Mark
5 days ago
3 min read

So, you’ve got the ring. You’ve posted the "I said yes!" picture. Now comes the part they don’t show in the rom-coms: the logistics.

Wedding planning is essentially a full-time job where your only salary is cake samples and a very expensive white dress. As a behavioral science enthusiast, I like to think of this checklist not as a "to-do list," but as Decision Fatigue Management. Here is your 12-month guide to getting down the aisle with your sanity (and your relationships) intact.

12 Months Out: The "Big Rocks" Phase

This is where we set the foundation. Don't worry about the napkins yet; worry about the outline.

The vibe: you have to envision how you want to spent your wedding day and what you want it to feel like BEFORE planning anything. Unsolicited advice will try to hijack your vision. You should have a strong shield to protect yourself against it.
The Budget (The "Reality Check"): Determine who is paying for what. Communication is key. Use the budget as a compass throughout your planning, check our easy-peasy budget calculator to save you a headache.
The Guest List (The "Draft"): You don’t need final names, but you need a "count." 50 vs. 200 is the difference between a cozy dinner and a logistical invasion.
Secure the Venue: Nothing is real until you have a date and a place. Once the deposit is paid, you officially have a wedding.

10-11 Months Out: The "Dream Team" Assembly

Book Your Photographers & Videographers: The good ones get snatched up faster than a Dunkin's box of donuts in a breakroom in Boston. You do need to ask the right questions, though, so come prepared. Use our vendor interview cheat sheets.
The Dress Search: Wedding dresses can take 6–9 months to order and alter. Yes, really. It’s basically like gestating a human; constantly complaining that your dress doesn't fit.
The Wedding Party: Ask your VIPs. Give them plenty of time to prepare for the financial and emotional toll of being a bridesmaid.

6-9 Months Out: The Logistics Deep-Dive

Catering & Cake: This is the best month. It’s 90% eating. Enjoy the "Decoy Effect"—where you’ll choose the middle-priced menu because the expensive one looks insane and the cheap one looks like a middle school cafeteria.
Save the Dates: Send these out. This will get people talking about your wedding, also prepare yourself for a renewed boost of energy after months of logistics.
The Registry: Time to be superficial and buy all the unnecessary things you suddenly CAN'T live without.
Hotel Blocks: Secure a place for your out-of-town guests so they don't end up on your couch.

4-5 Months Out: The Details That Matter

Florals & Decor: Decide if you’re going "full botanical garden" or "minimalist chic."
Invitations: Order them now and double-check the spelling of everything.
Wedding Bands: Go buy the rings. It’s the only part of the wedding you’ll actually wear every day for the next 50 years.

2-3 Months Out: The Home Stretch

Mail the Invitations: This is when the "RSVP Anxiety" begins.
Trial Hair & Makeup: Ensure you look like "you," but the version of you that has a professional lighting crew following them around.
The Marriage License: Check your local laws! This is the only document that actually makes it legal; the rest is just a very nice party.

1 Month Out: The Fine-Tuning

Final Walkthrough: Meet at the venue to discuss where the DJ goes and why the "Group Photo Trap" (see my other post!) is going to work.
The Seating Chart: This is a high-stakes game of social Tetris. Put the "fun" cousins near the bar and the "opinionated" aunts away from the speakers.
Break In Your Shoes: Wear your wedding shoes around the house with thick socks. Blisters are not a bridal accessory.

The Week Of: The "Let It Go" Phase

Final Payments: Get those envelopes ready and hand them to a trusted bridesmaid or coordinator.
Pack an Emergency Kit: Safety pins, Tide pens, ibuprofen, and a snack.
Hydrate and Sleep: You’ve done the work. Now it’s time to enjoy the masterpiece you’ve created.