How to Plan a Wedding That Reflects You

Yael Mark
7 days ago
2 min read

You’ll notice it the minute you get engaged: Everyone suddenly thinks they are Martha Stewart giving you their two cents, except with none of the talent.

Mostly Rational Bride, Yael Mark, 2025 Whether it be from family, friends, or complete strangers, the amount of unwarranted opinions you will hear about your wedding day will surely overwhelm you.

If you are first time bride, you are scientifically proven to be influenced by these input no matter how trash it is. You may even seek out these opinions for guidance or validation.

Since you only have one shot to get it right, this pressure is multiplied. All of this could lead to losing sight of your most authentic vision for your special day.

Step One: Define Your Wedding North Star (Before Anyone Else Does)

Here’s the biggest mistake couples make: They start planning details before deciding meaning. Before venues, colors, or guest counts, ask yourselves:

The 3-Question Reset

How do we want the day to feel? (Relaxed? Intimate? Joyful chaos? Emotional? Simple?)
What do we want to remember 10 years from now? (People? Food? Dancing? The ceremony?)
What are we willing to let be imperfect? (Because something always will be.)

Step Two: Build a Decision Filter (So You Stop Re-Deciding Everything)

When opinions inevitably start flying, use this simple test:

The Alignment Check

For every suggestion, ask:

Does this reflect us?
Does this support our top priorities?
Does this add joy—or just obligation?

The ones that didn't pass the test will go on to the next step.

Step Three : How to Deal with Unsolicited Advice

We've all heard unhinged advice from our crazy aunt Barbara. Unfortunately, telling her to mind her own damn business might get your Thanksgiving invitation revoked. Check out this guide on how to respond depending on your rapport.

Taken from Mostly Rational Bride (2025)

Pro Tips for Staying Grounded (When It Gets Loud)

• Make decisions when you’re calm, not after conversations • Revisit your “why” weekly • Take breaks from planning content and social media • Remember: other people’s weddings are not benchmarks

And when in doubt, ask:

“Would we care about this if no one else were watching?”

Looking for more?

If you want help navigating decisions, expectations, and the emotional noise without losing yourself in the process, check out our Bridal Toolkit.

Happy planning!